"Nolite te bastardes carborundorum.”

“…Don't let the bastards grind you down."

I finally finished my Peloponnese cardigan.

The pattern is by Sandi Rosner (Ravelry link here).

The wool I used is Paintbox Yarns Baby DK. I wouldn’t recommend it for a project like this as it’s not got great definition, but it’s blocked up nice and soft so I have fewer complaints than I thought I would.

I picked up more stitches for the edging than the pattern directed (as I normally end up with puckering if I stick to what the pattern says) but that has meant I have a slight ruffling effect. Not great but I don’t think you notice when you’re wearing it.

I also didn’t put buttons on it. I bought buttons, lovely tiny shiny ones, but I couldn’t face trying to line them all up on the riffly-ruffly bands. Plus I knew I would never button it up while wearing it. If it does stretch enough that I’d want to button it, I can always add them on later as the button holes are there.

One point of sadness – the first day I wore it out, no one mentioned it. I know that’s very immature of me – if I want to talk about it I should just raise the subject myself – but I can’t help it. I promise I’m not fishing for compliments, it’s just I only work with a small team who see me wear the same things over and over and who know I knit.

I think I just have a bit of a chip on my shoulder about my place here. I don’t feel like I fit in or that I’m ‘one of the team’ in the same way everyone else is, and the fact that no one notices or cares about me wearing what is obviously a handknit jumper…well it just confirms the apathy with which they view me!

Luckily I have got a new job (as has CB) so it will only be for a few months more. Then Peloponnese and I will show off to a whole other office (who will hopefully giver her the recognition she deserves!).

*Quote from Margaret Atwood

“The sun, -the bright sun, that brings back, not light alone, but new life, and hope, and freshness to man-”

“…burst upon the crowded city in clear and radiant glory.”

Oh my god, it’s been sunny lately. I had kissed goodbye to any hopes of warm weather ever arriving, thinking perhaps this was the price to be paid when living Oop North, but I was wrong – it is here!
So what do you do to celebrate? BBQ, obvs.

But also, you sit in the sunshine knitting a jumper.

Yeah, I got pretty sweaty. But you’ll notice the strong progress on Peloponnese – and I’m further along than that photo shows too! Squee!

I’ve also set myself a challenge of baking my way through Mary Berry’s Baking Bible. It’s not a new idea, it’s been done successfully by others, but that doesn’t make it a less worthwhile ambition. It doesn’t make it any easier though either…

I’ve already made a few things, so I went through and ticked off previous bakes (shout out to the old faithful Fork Biscuits!) and have tried a couple of new things.

Gingerbread (which was lovely and only improved throughout the week!)

Eccles cakes (which were lovely but I had too much pastry on the bottom so it didn’t cook through properly. Good laminations though.)

Uncooked

Cooked!

I’ve also made some chocolate chip cookies and some cheesy biscuits, but for whatever reason I didn’t photograph them.

Next up I really want to make jam. It’s not in the Baking Bible, but I just have this craving to make it…

So will next week be a FO or pictures of jam?
Watch this space…


*Quote from Charles Dickens

“No colours any more…”

“…I want them to turn black.”

Mikael is done! 7 weeks before the due date as well, which is nice.

Also nice is that I have a whole ball of the black MillaMia merino leftover, and a little bit of the Putty Grey. No idea what I’ll make, but that’s beside the point.

As ever, I struggled with the joining. For some reason I am incapable of getting a professional looking finish when I join the different bits together. Still, practice makes perfect, right?

I took two attempts to make the front band. Originally I picked up the number of stitches as stated in the pattern, but it pulled at the fabric and made it bulge. I assume I didn’t meet the gauge, at least on row height, and had more rows than expected. In any case, I had a bit of a tantrum, ripped it out, and came back calmer the next day and just picked up every stitch. Much longer process (it was about double the amount of stitches it should have been!) but the result looks far better.

It did mean I had to wing the placement of the buttonholes. I think they went alright, could have been better on the top button, but nothing I’ll lose sleep over.

As this baby is being born to some Very Cool People (seriously) I added a couple of cute quirks – an odd top button, and some geography-teacher-chic elbow patches.

Along with the hat it’s a pretty dapper outfit, suitable for a boy or a girl I think.

*Quote from The Rolling Stones

“But that is another story…”

“…and shall be told another time.” 

Never fear, Philly-fans, despite having a fair few weeks without any knitted-related content, I have indeed been continuing to knit behind the scenes.

Unfortunately my Peloponnese (Ravelry link to pattern here) has taken a back seat yet again. I’ve knitted both sleeves and the body, but the yoke and finishing will have to wait a bit longer.

I’ve decided instead to focus on knitting the Mikael cardigan (Ravelry link to pattern here) for my friend’s baby.

© MillaMia 2009

I think I have enough wool to finish this, but I would also like to add pockets and/or elbow patches to up the adorability factor. I therefore wanted to give myself enough time to order new wool should it turn out I don’t have enough in my stash box.

As ever, the MillaMia wool is lovely. Springy, soft, good stitch definition. I will definitely choose this again for projects, it’s worth the slightly higher price tag. In fact I should clarify that it’s still very much an affordable wool as compared with other, luxury types, it’s just that I’m a cheapskate thrifty.

In other news, I have been commissioned to do super special project, which has shot up to the top of my to-knit list. No details as yet as the concept is still pretty woolly (I’m so sorry), but watch this space…

*Quote from Michael Ende

“There is a crack, a crack in everything.”

“…That’s how the light gets in.”

So recently I had a bit of a wobble.

I felt overwhelmed with the amount of things I had to sort out or have responsibility for, and I struggled (and continue to struggle) with navigating the systems in place to address those things. I know that’s a very fuzzy description, but I’m sure you can appreciate why I can’t be more specific!

Advice tells us to write it all down, make a list. And sometimes that helps, I’ll admit. But sometimes it doesn’t. Sometimes seeing all the things you have to somehow achieve – not to mention the barriers that you are up against – just serves to justify the panic.

When I feel overwhelmed and anxious, I need to find a way to regain control. So I had a sit down and reviewed my lifestyle to try to assess how I got myself into this position.

Is it how I work? Is it the work itself? Is it the culture of where I work? Is it how I deal with stress? Is it related to how I spend my time outside of work?

It’s likely to be a combination of factors to be honest, but that doesn’t matter. I need to know what is making me feel upset and then see if these are things I can change, I can accept, or if I have to avoid them.

I fear that it’s this job. Not necessarily this career, but this job at this organisation. That I just don’t fit in here and I have to find myself a new job. Now there aren’t many jobs in my chosen career path, and there are close to none in the area of the UK I’d like to live in, and none at a pay grade I’d like. Plus CB is in a worse job than I am and so is fishing in the exact same pool. Which creates further stress and anxiety...

So what do you do? You hate your day-to-day existence, but you have no choice but to keep doing it. If I didn’t love my home life so much I’m not sure I would cope!

But there is beauty in that. I am broken, I know that, but I am still here and I continue to be here. And that is beautiful. I am beautiful. And can you really be unhappy when you know you are so beautiful?

*Quote from Leonard Cohen

“Seems I canna possess your soul…”

“…without losing my own.”

I just finished reading Outlander (Took all my willpower to not write Highlander) by Diana Gabaldon.

Picture from Wikipedia

In brief – I enjoyed it. The characters were amusing and likeable, they were pretty realistic and they didn’t do anything wildly out of character just to move the plot on. There were a couple of holes, but I am willing to suspend judgement and say they’d probably be worked out in later books.

However, I do not think I am going to read those books.

As much as I did enjoy the characters and plot, I found the whole thing needing a great deal of editing. Far too bloated a book. Way too much guff.

I appreciate that I don’t really give a fig about the sexy stuff or what people are wearing or whatever. After a certain point (i.e. as far as the plot and setting is needed) description adds (or should add) richness. I found that the ins and outs of the sex scenes was gratuitous and added absolutely nothing. But then, as I said, I don’t really want to read an erotic novel; others may love those bits.

But it wasn’t just the bodice-ripping parts that I skimmed through. We had about 5 pages at one point talking about killing a wolf. 5 pages. 1 wolf. Seriously. Far too bloated.

In all, it took me 11 days to finish. It shouldn’t have taken so long; it should have been a much shorter novel.

It’s a shame really. It’s a lot better than some of the Young Adult books I’ve read, but I’m more likely to continue reading books in those series as they are short and generally quite action-packed. They act as palate cleansers between more substantial book-meals.

This was like eating the same dinner every night. Really good for the first few evenings, but then you get sick of having the same flavours and textures over and over again…

Overall rating = 6/10

*Quote from Diana Gabaldon

“Walter Benjamin said a book can wait a thousand years unread…”

“…until the right reader happens to come along. Books are in no hurry.” 

Tsundoku is an untranslatable Japanese word that means “acquiring books and letting them pile up unread.”

We are all guilty of this, don’t deny it. And if you are some sort of alien who does not do this, I say: "Welcome to planet earth, if you hang around here for long enough you will start buying books and letting them pile up unread."

I have stopped buying books, true, but I am still in the nasty habit of borrowing books. From whoever will lend them to me. And letting them pile up unread.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m meticulous about returning them, but it can take me a long time to get around to reading them in the first place…

As CB and I hope to move within the next year or so, and as books are a pain in the proverbial to pack up and move, we have made a pact to try and read all our unread paperbacks by the end of the year. This includes both unread books and those we wish to reread. Of course there are books we will always keep – Lord of the Rings for instance – but those I don’t begrudge moving house with. It’s the ones I know I will read once (or once more) and then will jettison off to whoever will take it.

I have also been systematically taking all my books from my parents’ house to my current flat, resulting in a huge pile of unwanted unnecessary books. I only own one bookcase so until today I had numerous piles of books on the floor of our spare room. A couple of these piles have now been transported to the local library, which was very happy to accept them.

The thing about these piles of books is that they make me sad. I love books and I love reading, and if I’m not going to reread these guys I want them to find a new owner who will. A bookcase full of gorgeous volumes is a magical thing, a wall of adventures at the tips of your fingers. But knowing I will never go on those journeys again, that just makes me feel guilty and sad.

Set your books free people! Let them find new homes and new lovers!

*Quote from George Steiner