Well, I don't know about you but I seem to live in computer screens, rumpled duvets and large cups of tea.
*Quote from Philip James Bailey
Tuesday, 25 June 2013
"We live in deeds, not years: in thoughts, not breaths..."
"...In feelings, not in figures on a dial."
Well, I don't know about you but I seem to live in computer screens, rumpled duvets and large cups of tea.
*Quote from Philip James Bailey
Well, I don't know about you but I seem to live in computer screens, rumpled duvets and large cups of tea.
*Quote from Philip James Bailey
Thursday, 20 June 2013
"Workin' 9 to 5..."
"...What a way to make a livin'."
I sit here shivering in my little pink cardi and backless dress, chewing on my pen and lamenting the deceptive sun that shone through my window this morning. A line of drool dribbles down the macerated ballpoint and onto the minutes I’m editing. It lands in a doodle of transvestite fish with legs and a top hat inked earlier in red, which adds a sort of ‘Jack the Ripper-esque’ touch that usually escapes my scribbles. After admiring the artwork, I wipe my mouth with the back of my hand and surreptitiously glance around to see if anyone noticed. They didn’t; the fish and I are safe.
A little later, and no further with my editing, my skin is complaining of goose pimples and my tummy is gurgling. My mind instantly connects the two and produces a picture of a cup of tea. My mouth, delighted by the image, celebrates by acting independently of said brain and loudly announces its desire:
“TEA!”
I have not said this quietly. I have shouted “TEA” in a surprisingly deep voice apropos of (apparently) nothing. I cover brilliantly, obviously, and enquire as to the beverage requirements of the room. I’ve been in the office for 2 hours now and this is my third cup of the day, which is pretty much par for the course to be honest. I try to average one cup an hour as I’ve found this is a steady enough stream to keep the shakes at bay, but is occasional enough to keep colleagues from making snarky comments (these begin in jest but soon take on an edge of realism concerning contributions to the tea club kitty I’m just not comfortable with).
Another 10 minutes tick by, a few more red scrawls are added to the soggy document. I suddenly become aware that my left foot, curled up beneath me on my wheelie chair, has gone to sleep and I am faced with the eternal dilemma: do I leave it there and let the numbness grow, or do I move now and suffer the pain?
The world now splits into two – one universe follows the Philly who extricates the foot, digging her fingernails into her palms until the pain subsides, and doggedly continuing her procrastination.
The other universe follows the Philly who remains on the dead foot until the numbness progresses to her knee, forcing her to disentangle it manually. This Philly is then subject to the weekly fire alarm test which (despite hearing it every Friday at 11am) still makes her jump. This results in her good leg shooting out and kicking the desk, which provides the propulsion to rocket the wheelie chair backwards into a wall, the impact of which topples her from said chair which, owing to the aforementioned dead leg, she then struggles to climb back into.
I will leave it to you, dear reader, to judge which of these universes we live in.
*Quote from Dolly Parton
I sit here shivering in my little pink cardi and backless dress, chewing on my pen and lamenting the deceptive sun that shone through my window this morning. A line of drool dribbles down the macerated ballpoint and onto the minutes I’m editing. It lands in a doodle of transvestite fish with legs and a top hat inked earlier in red, which adds a sort of ‘Jack the Ripper-esque’ touch that usually escapes my scribbles. After admiring the artwork, I wipe my mouth with the back of my hand and surreptitiously glance around to see if anyone noticed. They didn’t; the fish and I are safe.
A little later, and no further with my editing, my skin is complaining of goose pimples and my tummy is gurgling. My mind instantly connects the two and produces a picture of a cup of tea. My mouth, delighted by the image, celebrates by acting independently of said brain and loudly announces its desire:
“TEA!”
I have not said this quietly. I have shouted “TEA” in a surprisingly deep voice apropos of (apparently) nothing. I cover brilliantly, obviously, and enquire as to the beverage requirements of the room. I’ve been in the office for 2 hours now and this is my third cup of the day, which is pretty much par for the course to be honest. I try to average one cup an hour as I’ve found this is a steady enough stream to keep the shakes at bay, but is occasional enough to keep colleagues from making snarky comments (these begin in jest but soon take on an edge of realism concerning contributions to the tea club kitty I’m just not comfortable with).
Another 10 minutes tick by, a few more red scrawls are added to the soggy document. I suddenly become aware that my left foot, curled up beneath me on my wheelie chair, has gone to sleep and I am faced with the eternal dilemma: do I leave it there and let the numbness grow, or do I move now and suffer the pain?
The world now splits into two – one universe follows the Philly who extricates the foot, digging her fingernails into her palms until the pain subsides, and doggedly continuing her procrastination.
The other universe follows the Philly who remains on the dead foot until the numbness progresses to her knee, forcing her to disentangle it manually. This Philly is then subject to the weekly fire alarm test which (despite hearing it every Friday at 11am) still makes her jump. This results in her good leg shooting out and kicking the desk, which provides the propulsion to rocket the wheelie chair backwards into a wall, the impact of which topples her from said chair which, owing to the aforementioned dead leg, she then struggles to climb back into.
I will leave it to you, dear reader, to judge which of these universes we live in.
*Quote from Dolly Parton
Tuesday, 11 June 2013
"So this is the New Year..."
"...and I don't feel any different."
Last year my only New Years Resolution was to “not die” and, as I achieved it, I planned to follow it this year with the inspiring “take care of myself”. I have since come to the conclusion that perhaps I should try to be a bit more ambitious. So here, much belatedly, I will define certain features of “taking care or myself”.
1) Spend more time with loved onesI have an uncanny ability to drop out of existence for weeks at a time. Although this is slightly beyond my control, I often find that the best way to pull yourself out of an antisocial fug is to force yourself to be social. I always know I’ll have a good time when I get there, it’s the effort of dragging myself out of the house first…
2) Improve my sense of well beingAs well as assuming everyone around me is immortal, I need to stop believing my sedentary, food-focussed lifestyle won’t have any adverse effects. Unfortunately this involves finding a way to enjoy eating better and doing regular exercise, in order to ultimately be happy in my own skin.
3) Make better use of my timeAs anyone who has lived with me can testify, there’s nothing I like better than sleeping late into the morning. There’s also few things I hate more than feeling I’ve slept my day away. I know I don’t make the most of my time and I would love to do more - be more productive, less slug-like. I like who I am, but I’d like it if that person could have a little more drive and energy. (I would also like to clarify – spending time completing video games counts as productive).
4) Utilise opportunitiesMy mood concerning my job fluctuates quite drastically. I won’t say I want a new career path, but I want to know I’m making the most out of every opportunity that comes up.
What are you mid-year resolutions??
* Quote from Death Cab for Cutie
Last year my only New Years Resolution was to “not die” and, as I achieved it, I planned to follow it this year with the inspiring “take care of myself”. I have since come to the conclusion that perhaps I should try to be a bit more ambitious. So here, much belatedly, I will define certain features of “taking care or myself”.
1) Spend more time with loved onesI have an uncanny ability to drop out of existence for weeks at a time. Although this is slightly beyond my control, I often find that the best way to pull yourself out of an antisocial fug is to force yourself to be social. I always know I’ll have a good time when I get there, it’s the effort of dragging myself out of the house first…
2) Improve my sense of well beingAs well as assuming everyone around me is immortal, I need to stop believing my sedentary, food-focussed lifestyle won’t have any adverse effects. Unfortunately this involves finding a way to enjoy eating better and doing regular exercise, in order to ultimately be happy in my own skin.
3) Make better use of my timeAs anyone who has lived with me can testify, there’s nothing I like better than sleeping late into the morning. There’s also few things I hate more than feeling I’ve slept my day away. I know I don’t make the most of my time and I would love to do more - be more productive, less slug-like. I like who I am, but I’d like it if that person could have a little more drive and energy. (I would also like to clarify – spending time completing video games counts as productive).
4) Utilise opportunitiesMy mood concerning my job fluctuates quite drastically. I won’t say I want a new career path, but I want to know I’m making the most out of every opportunity that comes up.
What are you mid-year resolutions??
* Quote from Death Cab for Cutie
Tuesday, 4 June 2013
"'Cause I'm as free as a bird now..."
"...and this bird you cannot change."
My life is soon to take a bit of a turn. Recently I was offered a job, similar to the post I currently hold but at a faster paced and more innovative Local Authority. And I jumped.
Now I'm suffering the fallout of leaving my current job. Some people know and are happy for me, some are unaware which makes me feel like a traitor and a liar, and some know and are setting out to make the move as difficult as possible.
Every time I get upset I think, "go to the mattresses" - it's not personal, it's business. It's not personal, it's business. And if I had enjoyed my current post more then I wouldn't be leaving. Nothing people do or say now can change the dissatisfaction I've been dealing with for the past 18 months.
Every time I feel unsure whether I'm making the right choice I think, "Free Bird" - I can't let the fear of something new keep me down, I'd rather try and fail than never try at all.
Even though it's only a new job, I'm using it to spring clean my life. I've signed my contract to live in London for another year, I've cut my hair to my shoulders and I'm currently gutting my possessions. Everyone I know seems to be moving forward in their lives - with partners, careers, commitment, property... It's time to stop dreaming of what I want to be when I grow up, and realise that I've done all my growing. I'm 25, I am what I am, and I need to take control over my life and the world around me.
Throughout my career I've been plagued by people looking down at me and assuming I didn't know what I was doing. Maybe that owed a little to my age, or to my gender, but I believe that people will take you as they see you. If I feel confident and in control, others won't doubt me.
Tune in next time for my mental breakdown...?
* Quote from Lynyrd Skynyrd
My life is soon to take a bit of a turn. Recently I was offered a job, similar to the post I currently hold but at a faster paced and more innovative Local Authority. And I jumped.
Now I'm suffering the fallout of leaving my current job. Some people know and are happy for me, some are unaware which makes me feel like a traitor and a liar, and some know and are setting out to make the move as difficult as possible.
Every time I get upset I think, "go to the mattresses" - it's not personal, it's business. It's not personal, it's business. And if I had enjoyed my current post more then I wouldn't be leaving. Nothing people do or say now can change the dissatisfaction I've been dealing with for the past 18 months.
Every time I feel unsure whether I'm making the right choice I think, "Free Bird" - I can't let the fear of something new keep me down, I'd rather try and fail than never try at all.
Even though it's only a new job, I'm using it to spring clean my life. I've signed my contract to live in London for another year, I've cut my hair to my shoulders and I'm currently gutting my possessions. Everyone I know seems to be moving forward in their lives - with partners, careers, commitment, property... It's time to stop dreaming of what I want to be when I grow up, and realise that I've done all my growing. I'm 25, I am what I am, and I need to take control over my life and the world around me.
Throughout my career I've been plagued by people looking down at me and assuming I didn't know what I was doing. Maybe that owed a little to my age, or to my gender, but I believe that people will take you as they see you. If I feel confident and in control, others won't doubt me.
Tune in next time for my mental breakdown...?
* Quote from Lynyrd Skynyrd
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